Dealing

I've never had to deal with as much as I am dealing with now. It should be overwhelming, I guess, but it's not...I can't do much about half of what I am facing, so this is a true lesson in letting go and doing what I can about what I do have control over. Now that I have so much on my plate, I find myself being grateful for the smallest blessings, because the big ones aren't as obvious right now. It's appropriate that today is Ash Wednesday, because part of Lent is embracing change, and trying to to change a little bit about yourself to be reminded more of God. I'm still not sure what I'm giving up or changing exactly, but I am going to try to stop worrying about every single thing in existence. It wastes energy and time that you could be putting into work, thought, enjoyment, anything. 

It's like, I want to become more of the person I am when I'm sitting on my beach at sunset. It's where I go to clear my thoughts and let the sheer enormity and awe of the ocean wash over me, and for me, there is no place more peaceful. I feel as if nothing bad can happen when I'm on my beach...and although it might be unrealistic to think that about all of life, I can at least try to clear myself of being fidgety and worrying all the time. The way I see it, life is constantly moving forward, and time never stops for anyone. Everything, literally everything, passes, and with that, bad things can fade and good things can strengthen. Each day, I remind myself that life is full of possibilities and opportunities to be happy, to find joy.

I have to remind myself, lest I forget.