The Storm Always Abates

Every storm has an end, no matter how hard it might be to see when you're being drenched in a downpour and all that is visible is the obscurity of the clouds around you.

You see me sitting here, a smile upon my face
The time has come but you know that it's not too late
There's been too many things, together we have seen
It's not too hard if we start to believe
And we're not gonna take anymore
Can we try to erase all the pain
So please

Show me a reason, give me a sign
Tell me the way we, fall out of line
Is it today or is it tonight?
We'll find, the answer to our life

This world is not at ease, we seem to hide the truth
Thinking there's only so much we can really do
It's up to you and me, to face our destiny
The jury's here so let's take the stand
And we're not gonna take anymore
Can we try to erase all the pain
So Please

Tell me why we have to cry
And not try
When there's so many things we can do
To help this troubled world start a new

I need a reason, I need a sign
There's no turning back I'm here by your side
Is it today or maybe tonight?
We'll find
The answer to our life
Show me the way, give me a sign
Tell me the way we fall out of line
Is it today, is it tonight
The answer to our life

Those are the lyrics to my favorite Backstreet Boys song since 2001, when Black and Blue came out. Not only is the beat insanely catchy, but the words are poetry in their message. The lyrics are vague and poppy, of course, but in the end, they are being somewhat philosophical about why we live, and in the end, it doesn't matter. Fate isn't here to carry us along for a journey; you make your own destiny, and the best thing you can do is work with what you have. Be proactive in your own destiny. Make your own happiness. There is nothing waiting to hand you your joy; you have to make joy, because the only thing that's easy is unhappiness.

This week has been hard. One of the hardest, which is remarkable, considering that I've had weeks spent in hospitals and courthouses, and days where I wasn't sure I'd live to see the sunset. I suppose that this week was completely dependent on me to sink or swim, and I'm still unclear as to which I chose. I hope I swam as much as I could, though there was quite a countercurrent. Regardless, Im still so grateful for every day that I wake up and am alive. It's funny, I pulled an all nighter last night, and I am slightly but expectedly delirious right now. I wasn't that excited about no sleep, but the thought also came to me that at least I was given the gift of being alive, the gift of being able to be awake and healthy and able to work towards a real future for myself. Every day that has crappy weather, when I look awful, when I'm feeling homesick, when people are being annoying..is still a day that I was given. I can choose to be sad and irritated and angry...or I can choose to rejoice that I am here to feel, to love, to learn. I get frustrated when people waste their time on things like constant complaining or on doing things that aren't good for them, good for others. I know that I can't tell people what to do...I just wish that I could. Life is so short, and you only get one to live!

WHY ARE YOU WASTING IT?

Happy Thanksgiving, world.