Adulting

It's been about a week of adulthood (read: full time job and living in an apartment), and everything that could have gone wrong, has. It's been sweltering hot, then rainy, and this apartment has basically no climate control. I was sold bad chicken, I blew a fuse, and I have cut multiple fingers both at home and at work. Paper cuts are a job hazard of working in an archive, I suppose. Work is fun, but can get tedious, and it is NOT social. This is the most alone time I have had...ever, and I must say that I wish it bothered me, but it actually doesn't bother me one bit. I really like being by myself and having utter freedom to do as I please, which generally consists of cooking and reading. Try not to be astounded by how exciting I am.

All in all, I am enjoying it, and what still feels like a detox from the year. I think, at heart, I am very much a hermit, or at least, antisocial. It's a very strange thing, to realize in the middle of your college career that you'd often rather be alone than meeting people. This is supposed to be when you are making 1000 different friends and many more acquaintances, making all of your mistakes in front of an audience, and always have people around. This was my life 24/7 my first two years, and I started to pull away from all of that as I changed how I lived my academic and extracurricular life. I'm happier now, by far, but I also can see and feel the change, and the constraints of normalcy are something I constantly ruminate upon. Is the life I have chosen, normal? One with fewer friends and more filling? Does it matter, in the end, of the world's normal versus my normal?

Not at all.