oh miedo

Fear. It's a great motivator, and a great source of hesitation. I hate fear, and I have it, which is quite irritating sometimes. It holds you back from getting what you want because you feel like the risk isn't worth the great thing that could happen. "Should" is my least favorite word in the dictionary, because we all say that we "should" do something that we would absolutely love to do, which is inevitably followed by the "but I can't because..." BECAUSE OF FEAR. Hesitation holds us back so so often....being realistic, of course we can't do everything we'd love to do because life doesn't generally allow every person that luxury. However, there are so many things that we COULD do, that we don't, because of fear. I find that the most common fear is the fear of losing your own self image, ego, or the high opinions of the people around you. 

Well you know what? If you are confident enough, and if you are surrounded by the right people, you will feel better,not worse, after you have taken a risk. My last year of high school was also the point at which I decided to stop caring what people thought of me and let go of trying to seem "cool", and just be weird/take the risks I have always wanted to. I managed, in letting go of a lot of my inhibitions (no alcohol necessary), to find myself, to be much happier. I became louder, more outgoing, and "bubbly" because I wasn't worried about projecting some image of myself that I was cool or whatever. I found myself dancing like an idiot in public, laughing with strangers, becoming friends with the Starbucks staff, and somehow freaking a few people out...but if people are desiring to see you as strange instead of funny or just good-crazy, do you really want to hang out with them? I think those people are just a little boring, or a little too afraid of embracing their own silly side. 

Let me not give out a false image of myself. I still have fears. When I got to college, I toned myself down a lot because I didn't want to alienate anyone...and now that I have really cool friends, I'm totally letting go of that, because it was just me ignoring my personality. Right now I am battling myself in being the (incredibly) straightforward girl I am versus not potentially scaring someone off....and it's hard, because going with fear is so much easier. It makes life less interesting, and less fun, but it is also a safer feeling. You have to push yourself to travel the road of less surety.

I leave you with a quote: "People can live a hundred years without really living for a minute. You climb up here with me, it's one less minute you haven't lived." -Logan, Gilmore Girls